are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
