Don't you send me to vm
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I pour the whiskey from now on
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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