Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
