Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
