Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
