I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
