you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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