Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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