Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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