The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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