he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize