if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
