He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
