I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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