Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
