Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
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definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
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All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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