I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
