Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I'm experimenting with sincerity
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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