11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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