just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
