Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize