DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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