oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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