i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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