New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Randomize
