so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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