Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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