How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Randomize
