In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
