i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
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