What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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