Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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