SEEEEXXX PLEASE
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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