Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Randomize
