Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
