if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
