In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize