Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
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Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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