i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize