am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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