we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
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Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
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Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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