I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
