I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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