apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
