Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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