btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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