apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Let's get the cat blown out
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
