I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize