i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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