People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize