Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we still banned from the library?
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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